{"id":712,"date":"2015-12-02T23:58:08","date_gmt":"2015-12-02T17:58:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/?p=712"},"modified":"2021-06-18T19:45:46","modified_gmt":"2021-06-18T13:45:46","slug":"this-is-50-part-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/?p=712","title":{"rendered":"THIS IS 50, PART ONE."},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A funny thing happened as I was preparing to write a new blahg.\u00a0 \"ScottFunny\u00a0things always happen on the way to work, the forum, this blahg.\u00a0 The truth is that maybe it’s not all that funny but I intend this blahg to be funny regardless.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong>\u00a0This is blahg number 50.\u00a0 That’s right, I counted them all up and there were exactly 49 before this blahg.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Fifty blahgs in 4 years?\u00a0 I’m sure that’s not a record to boast about.\u00a0 I remember when I started this blahg that I had high ambitions.\u00a0 I deluded myself into thinking I could write two blahgs a week.\u00a0 I then amended that goal to write 50 blahgs before I turned 50.\u00a0 I turned 50 in September of 2012.\u00a0 I guess I missed that goal as well.\u00a0 To tell the truth, I’m just glad that I’m still writing; even if I don’t know if anyone is reading.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 If I’m being really honest, some of my blahgs were a cheat; in a way.\u00a0 There have been a couple of video blahgs and one where I just posted “Je Suis Charlie.”\u00a0 \"A<\/a>Still, those were times where I made a concentrated effort to at least post something.\u00a0 So what about this blahg?\u00a0 I don’t really want to rehash what I’ve posted before but I also want to pay homage to the 49 blahgs before this one.\u00a0 And I wanted to make it funny.\u00a0 So, I thought fifty statements pulled from or related to the previous blahgs that sum up my philosophies.\u00a0 Of course, I realize that posting 50 statements with some commentary, images, or music would make this a very long blahg indeed.\u00a0 That’s why this blahg has a “Part One” added to it.\u00a0 You’ll get the second half in my next blahg.
\n<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Here goes with Part One:\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

1.\u00a0 The Most Happy Sound<\/em>.\u00a0 I guess this is subjective.\u00a0 It might be the sound of your own voice or someone else’s voice when they’re telling you they love you, or they like you, or they tolerate you, or they’re paying back that money you loaned to them and gave up all hope of getting back.\u00a0 Maybe it’s the first sound or first word from your child.\u00a0 It could be music or a train whistle or a dog whistle if your hearing’s that good.\u00a0 I think the most happy sound is “there, another blahg done”.\u00a0<\/em><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

2.\u00a0 Frank Sinatra.\u00a0\u00a0<\/em>I wrote two blahgs in the beginning about Sinatra.\u00a0 If you haven’t guessed:\u00a0 I AM A FAN.\u00a0 \"It's<\/a>I once saw a button that said, “It’s Sinatra’s World, We Just Live In It”.\u00a0 <\/em>Given that Sinatra would have been 100 on December 12th of this year, I think that’s still appropriate.\u00a0 Come back to the five and dime, Frank Sinatra, Frank Sinatra.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

3.\u00a0 When A Good Man Goes Missing.\u00a0 <\/em>Go looking for him.\u00a0 There’s a lyric to a song from the movie “Meet Danny Wilson” starring Frank Sinatra and Shelly Winters that goes like this:\u00a0 “A good man nowadays is hard to find.”\u00a0 <\/em>No he’s not.\u00a0 Sometimes he’s right under your nose…or behind this blahg.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

4.\u00a0 Turn off your cell phone.\u00a0 <\/em>That originally was meant for people in movie theaters.\u00a0 Now I’ll open it up to everywhere else.\u00a0 Turn it off and put it away.\u00a0 You might just discover there’s a big beautiful world out there that you couldn’t see behind your phone’s screen.\u00a0 You might also avoid walking into a telephone pole or oncoming traffic. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

5.\u00a0 \"Milk<\/a>David Letterman Broke My Cookie.<\/em>\u00a0 Mmmmmmm, cookies!\u00a0 Especially Christmas cookies.\u00a0 Pass the milk please.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

6.\u00a0 Merry Christmas.<\/em>\u00a0 I know it’s probably not politically correct to say that but substitute words and celebrate whatever you celebrate.\u00a0 Me?\u00a0 I said it was going to be Sinatra’s birthday on December 12th.\u00a0 I’ll celebrate that.\u00a0 Happy Birthday Ol’ Blue Eyes!\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

7.\u00a0 Happy New Year!\u00a0\u00a0 <\/em>In another month it will be 2016.\u00a0 Of course the Chinese New Year won’t be until February 8th, 2016.\u00a0 It will be the year of the Monkey.\u00a0 I was born in the year of the Tiger.\u00a0 My youngest daughter was also born in the year of the Tiger.\u00a0 Funny, neither of us looks good in stripes.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

8.\u00a0 The Death of A Big One<\/em>.\u00a0 I wrote that blahg about the shutting down of the file sharing website, Megaupload.\u00a0 That now defunct website has been in the news again recently.\u00a0 Shady dealings and underworld ties are all the rumors.\u00a0 That particular blahg also saw the publication of one of my poems, “The Death of a Big One,” about a giant snowman and my friend ‘The Gar’.\u00a0 I reconnected with ‘The Gar’ by email this year.\u00a0 That will be this thought.\u00a0 Reach out and touch someone…but ask permission<\/em> first. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

9.\u00a0 The Washing Machine.<\/em>\u00a0 Well, we still have that washing machine and it still works.\u00a0 My old dishwasher died however this past year but I won’t mourn it here.\u00a0 Besides, the new one works much better.\u00a0 \"dryer<\/a>Oh, by the way, clean out your lint traps on your drier and vacuum out the venting hose.\u00a0 We found that made a world of difference in our drying time.\u00a0 Anyone know how to knit a sweater from 10 pounds of dryer lint? <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

10.\u00a0 A Little Crazy In The Head.\u00a0 <\/em>Or you could say, Poco Loco In The Coco.\u00a0 A nice song but then I don’t need a song to tell me I’m a little loco.\u00a0 Who am I kidding?\u00a0 If the loco comes in any other sizes, I’m probably an extra-large.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

11.\u00a0 April Fools.\u00a0 <\/em>My friend, Glenda, was born on April 1st.\u00a0 She is very clear that if a joke is played after noon on that day then it doesn’t count as an April Fool’s Day joke.\u00a0 I wonder if she was born before noon?\u00a0 If not, then I guess she’s just an ordinary fool or joke like the rest of us.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

12.\u00a0 I Shined Jerry Lewis’ Shoe.<\/em>\u00a0 True story but then you’d know that already if you’d read that blahg.\u00a0 This past weekend I re-watched “The Geisha Boy”.\u00a0 It is still a very funny and moving film.\u00a0 When are they going to release his last movie, “Max Rose?”\u00a0 Get on with it!\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

13.\u00a0 Toshiba Sucks.\u00a0 <\/em>I don’t know if they still do but I still have problems with my Toshiba Blu-Ray player.\u00a0 Really, it was their customer service and their product that did all the sucking…sucking the energy right out of me.\u00a0 Only a Hoover should suck.\u00a0 Get it? <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

14.\u00a0 Some Things To Celebrate.\u00a0 <\/em>Well, let’s see.\u00a0 Christmas.\u00a0 New Years.\u00a0 A Federal Liberal majority here in Canada.\u00a0 Oh, and there’s that thing about Sinatra’s 100th Birthday.\u00a0 Did I mention that already?\u00a0 Probably did, but then maybe I didn’t.\u00a0 My mind’s a little fuzzy, I’ve made it to 50 and I’ve been celebrating a little too hard. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

15.\u00a0 The Life of Riley.\u00a0 <\/em>\"The<\/a>The salt of the earth.\u00a0 The apple of my eye.\u00a0 The sweat of your brow.\u00a0 Practise what you preach.\u00a0 The writing is on the wall<\/em>.\u00a0 All phrases that have come and gone and come back again.\u00a0 PT Barnum once put up a sign saying\u00a0“this way to the egress”.\u00a0 He wanted to move\u00a0his patrons along but when they went to find the egress they found the exit instead.\u00a0 They both mean the same thing.\u00a0 He also said there’s a sucker\u00a0born every minute.\u00a0 If you’ve read this far, I guess it’s true. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

16.\u00a0 Advice For The Next 50:\u00a0 Think For Yourself.\u00a0 <\/em>I’m tired.\u00a0 You think of something funny for this one. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

17.\u00a0 Remembering Phyllis Diller.<\/em>\u00a0 I still miss Phyllis Diller but it’s time to remember some other celebrities who left us in 2015:\u00a0 Dickie Moore<\/em> (Our Gang star and first on screen kiss for Shirley Temple…not too shabby).\u00a0\u00a0Martin Milner<\/em> (Route 66 & Adam 12.\u00a0 “One Adam 12, One Adam 12, see the man.”).\u00a0 Jean Darling <\/em>(another Our Gang star.\u00a0 Are there any left?)\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong>\"Yvonne<\/a><\/span><\/strong>Yvonne Craig<\/em> (1960s Batgirl.\u00a0 Forget Cat Woman, it was always Batgirl).\u00a0 Omar Sharif <\/em> (“Lawrence of Arabia”, “Doctor Zhivago”, “Funny Girl”…that guy had class).\u00a0 Patrick Macnee<\/em> (Another actor with class.\u00a0 John Steed from The Avengers…not Marvel folks, the British spy series).\u00a0 Dick Van Patten<\/em> (One of my favorite TV Dads.\u00a0 Father to the “Eight Is Enough” brood).\u00a0 Leonard Nimoy <\/em>(Spock, among other things.\u00a0 I got to meet him and shook his hand about 7\u00a0years ago.\u00a0 He was a delight).\u00a0 Anita Ekberg\u00a0 <\/em>(What a beauty.\u00a0 I think she was the ‘bust’ in the Jerry Lewis & Dean Martin comedy “Hollywood or Bust”).\u00a0 \"ellymay\"<\/a>Donna Douglas<\/em> (Elly May Clampett on\u00a0<\/span>The Beverly Hillbillies. \u00a0<\/em>Did I say it was Batgirl that floated my boat? \u00a0I better amend that to say it was a tie with Elly May). \u00a0Frank\u00a0<\/em>(Our Christmas Cat. \u00a0We had to have him put down this year and he still is missed every day). <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

18. \u00a0My Christmas Wish List. \u00a0<\/em>I don’t know what’s on my Christmas Wish List for 2015 besides World Peace. \u00a0World Peace should always come first because everything comes second to that. \u00a0Health, love, and happiness are all there. \u00a0I wished on the first star of the evening the other night and wished for World Peace and then a Happy Christmas with my family. \u00a0That’s all I really need. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

19. \u00a0What Is Wrong With The World?<\/em> \u00a0I ask myself that every day. \u00a0Maybe I should spin that question and ask what’s right with the world. \u00a0What Is Right With The World? \u00a0<\/em>There are lots of good people and lots of good things happening. \u00a0Unfortunately those get overshadowed by the bad things done by bad people. \u00a0Maybe it’s time to focus on acknowledging all the good. \u00a0Remember my little ditty? \u00a0“Do good. \u00a0Do good, it’s brotherhood. \u00a0It feels so good to say, ‘I did good’.”\u00a0<\/em><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

20. \u00a0If You Can Read This, You’re Too Close.<\/em> \u00a0\"If<\/a>Leave it to me to turn a bumper sticker into a blahg about my own poetry. \u00a0Roses are red, violets are blue, if you like my poetry, there may be something wrong with you. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

21. \u00a0The Better Person. \u00a0<\/em>Be the better person. \u00a0You may be right but you don’t always have to prove it. \u00a0To heck with that. \u00a0I’m always right. \u00a0In your face! <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

22. \u00a0Deanna Durbin. \u00a0<\/em>My body might belong to Batgirl or Elly May <\/span><\/strong>\"Lady<\/a><\/em><\/span><\/strong>but my heart, after my wife, belongs to Deanna Durbin. \u00a0Do yourself a favor and watch “Lady On A Train” over this Christmas season. \u00a0It’s always a favorite in our house. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

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23. More Poetry From The Mind of Scott Henderson.<\/em>\u00a0 Here’s one for this holiday season.\u00a0 If you ever wondered about the word ‘Xmas’ then this might explain it to you. <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u2018bout Xmas<\/span><\/strong><\/h4>\n

now I don\u2019t expect
\nya\u2019ll get the meanin\u2019
\nof that
\n\u2018til sometime
\nin mid-july<\/h4>\n

and ya\u2019ll be sittin\u2019
\nin the cab
\nof a half ton truck
\nstopped at
\na railroad crossin\u2019<\/h4>\n

and ya\u2019ll look up
\nat that
\nbig X sign<\/h4>\n

and ya\u2019ll remember
\nmid-december
\nin yer winter parka
\nat the Walmart checkout
\nbehind someone searchin\u2019
\nthrough her purse
\nfer the correct change<\/h4>\n

 <\/p>\n

24. I Am Still Here.<\/em> This was a sad blahg about the death of my friend Roni and our little kitten, Willow (aka Super Faster Hair).\u00a0 \"Zoey<\/a>I had not written for a while before posting that blahg.\u00a0 That happened again this year after the passing of our beautiful cat Frank.\u00a0 Over the past 4 years of writing this blahg, we lost not only our cats Willow and Frank but June and Stella as well.\u00a0 I don’t want this to be all sad so I’m posting a picture here of Zoey and Annie.\u00a0 Zoey has been with us a couple of years but Annie is our new addition that came into our home this past August.\u00a0 This is the first picture I have posted of our little black kitten, Annie.\u00a0 You can see that she and Zoey are best friends.\u00a0 Click on the picture for a larger view.
\n<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

25.\u00a0 All That Jazz.\u00a0 <\/em>The original title of that blahg was “Zoey, Frank, June & All That Jazz” but I’ve already talked about the cats.\u00a0 \"\"<\/a>I continue to enjoy Dixieland Jazz and I think I have mentioned, or maybe I haven’t, that I really like The Salt City Five who later became The Salt City Six.\u00a0 If you are curious about the name, they originate from Syracuse, New York which once had big Salt productions.\u00a0 Now you know the history of the name and now you can enjoy their music.\u00a0 Here’s a real swinger called “That’s A-Plenty”, taken from their self-titled LP “The Salt City Five” on the Jubilee label.\u00a0 <\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n\nhttp:\/\/www.falseducks.com\/theblahg\/audiofiles\/ThatsAPlenty.mp3<\/a><\/audio>\n

Next time:\u00a0 THIS IS 50, PART TWO
\n<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A funny thing happened as I was preparing to write a new blahg.\u00a0 Funny\u00a0things always happen on the way to work, the forum, this blahg.\u00a0 The truth is that maybe it’s not all that funny but I intend this blahg to be funny regardless.\u00a0 \u00a0This is blahg number 50.\u00a0 That’s right, I counted them all […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/712"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=712"}],"version-history":[{"count":46,"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/712\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4832,"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/712\/revisions\/4832"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=712"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=712"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/falseducks.com\/theblahg\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=712"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}