The False Ducks Blahg

   You’ll probably be confused by the title of this blahg but if you give me a moment, I’ll explain.  I’m going to take a break from my DVD reviews and post something fun…at least for me.  The title refers to a recent purchase I made at a local thrift store.  It’s a Hohner Comet harmonica made in Germany that I found for $20.  Here are some photos of my purchase: 

I’ve always wanted a nice harmonica and this one is more than nice.  It is fantastic but I need to spend some time to learn how to play it. I’ll update you on that later on.

   After I purchased the Comet I began to have the threads of a short story idea bouncing around in my head.  The result is the short story below that bears the same name as the harmonica and the title of the blahg.  Short blahg this time around but a longish short story.  I hope you like it.

The Hohner Comet

By Scott Henderson

            The Comet was a thing of beauty against the sky.  The sun caught it just right and it glimmered and glistened and caught Wade Benson’s focus.  He slowly lowered his hands and brought the Comet to his mouth and blew.  It sounded even better than it looked.

            The Hohner Comet was the harmonica Wade had denied himself all these years.  In fact, he didn’t know he really wanted it until he saw it and even then convinced himself he had wanted it all his life.  He’d affirmed himself of that and the first sounds he produced from it made him believe even more that the purchase was warranted.

            He’d had a toy plastic harmonica when he was younger and there was a small metal one tossed in a junk drawer years ago but they were nothing like the Hohner Comet.  The Comet was a gleaming metal masterpiece just over six inches in length with double rows of twenty holes front and back and curved from side to side like a crescent moon more than a comet.  At its maximum width on both ends it was three inches and required two hands to handle it properly.

            Wade couldn’t believe it when he saw it in the glass case of overpriced items at a local thrift store.  He’d almost passed it by because it was surrounded by small antiques and cameras and graphic novels and action figures; all ticketed higher than their value.  Nestled in the middle, barely visible in its slightly closed gold case with red trim and lettering, the Comet called to him and this time the price label didn’t induce sticker shock.

            “Can I see that case in the middle?” he had asked of a teen-aged attendant.  He tried not to show enthusiasm.

            The salesperson grabbed up the harmonica and handed it to Wade.  It was just another piece of merchandise and the young woman offered it up without any expression or any words passing between her and the potential customer.

            Wade gently opened the case and casually removed the Comet and flipped it over and examined both sides.  The case was in good shape but the Comet was remarkable.

            “I’ll take it,” Wade said, not trying to betray exuberant interest.  He handed over the exact purchase price and slipped it into his jacket pocket.  He exited slowly and methodically and didn’t look back.  Twenty dollars was a bargain and he almost felt like he was stealing it.

            Outside, he quickly removed the Comet and held it up against the sun.  The Comet was a thing of beauty against the sky.  The sun caught it just right and it glimmered and glistened.  Wade lowered it to his mouth and blew gently against the scale of notes.  The sounds that emanated were even more beautiful than the Comet itself.  This was when he knew for a fact that the Comet had been calling to him all his life.

            “Lorna will hate it,” he said aloud to himself.  Then he realized that Lorna wouldn’t be at home to see it.  They were on a break.  She’d never understand anyway, he thought.  There were things about him now that even he didn’t understand.

            It had been a rough year for Wade.  It had started with the death of his Father.  Wade hadn’t found a way to recover from that.  His Father had been sick for some time but with his passing, Wade found himself racked with guilt; lost and searching for something.  He couldn’t describe it.

            Slowly, it began to affect his relationship with Lorna.  He didn’t know what to say to her.  He couldn’t tell her what he was thinking or feeling because he struggled himself to put words to it.  He withdrew from her and the more he regressed into himself, the larger the distance grew between them.

            Wade shoved the thoughts out of his mind.  Standing outside beside his vehicle with a glistening harmonica was not the right place or the right time to try to make sense of things.  Besides, his mouth was somehow sticky from his attempt at producing music from the Comet.  Wade looked at the harmonica and noticed a slight residue on one side.  In his excitement of the purchase he had failed to notice it.  Wade wiped his lips on his sleeve, returned the Comet to its case, and then opened his car door; placing the harmonica gently on the passenger seat.

            On the drive home he thought about the Comet and the experience of holding it and playing it in the parking lot.  He tried not to think of anything else but thoughts of Lorna seeped in and memories of his Father hung around the edges until everything began to mesh with those faint notes of the Comet.

            At home, he diligently disinfected the mouth organ and put an even brighter shine to the metal.  He cleaned the case and replaced the Comet and brought it to his desk for further examination.

            The first thing he did was to research the age and value of his purchase.  He was startled to discover that it was as old as he was.  More than a half century before, Wade and the Comet had come into existence in the same year.  He’d also been correct about it being worth more than he had paid.  His Hohner Comet was worth almost five times the price he’d paid.  He couldn’t understand why they had let it go so cheaply.  He also didn’t know what that residue had been on one side.  He tried not to dwell on that.  He’d cleaned it well and now it was time to learn to use it correctly.

            There had been no instruction manual with the Comet and online information on how to properly play the instrument differed greatly.  Wade viewed a few different videos until he stumbled on one that spoke to him about how he felt about the harmonica.  It was all about the individual tones and familiarizing yourself with each note in sequence.  It wasn’t about jumping into trying to play right away or learning an introductory song like ‘Pop Goes The Weasel’.  Wade understood that.  The Comet deserved better of him.

            In the video, the instructor explained the range of notes on the scale and how you could produce different sounds by blowing directly into the holes and by drawing your breath back again through the same openings.  He stressed the need to begin with listening to each of the twenty notes individually and not the sequence or even trying to play two or more notes at once.

            Wade followed the advice in the video and used painter’s tape to cover all of the holes except the one note he wanted to hear.  The instructor had railed against the use of masking tape because it would leave a sticky residue each time it was removed.

            “So that’s what that was,” Wade said aloud to no one in particular.  He’d tried not to give much thought to what he’d felt against his lips but the possibilities had not conjured great images. In the end, he’d pacified himself with the notion that it was caused by a child’s grimy hands fingering the Comet.  He could have believed that but the residue hadn’t tasted like peanut-butter or jam or anything less offensive so he tried to let it go.  The masking tape explanation eventually left him more at ease.

            Wade removed himself to the living room and sat in his favourite chair.  It was quiet now without Lorna.  It wasn’t that she made constant noise or talked incessantly but he we accustomed to her sounds.  Now, the house was empty and he was alone with his thoughts…and his harmonica.

            He held the Comet to his mouth and began slowly with the upper and lower holes on the far left and listened to the lowest register of the scale.  He closed his eyes and listened to the notes echo against the walls.  He was right, Lorna would have hated it.

            “Stop it,” he said; again, to no one in particular.  He’d have to try harder to push thoughts of Lorna out of his mind.

            It wasn’t easy.  He knew the break was his fault.  He knew it was coming.  Lorna hadn’t said anything but Wade had seen the signs and he’d done nothing to prevent it.  Even his children knew.  They were grown and had homes of their own and did not drop in as frequently as they once did.  Even his youngest had chosen a University far enough away so that she’d have an excuse not to visit as often.  Wade was sorry for all of that.

            “I said stop it!” he said again as firmly as he could.  Try as he might, though, the thoughts kept coming.  Wade was a man alone with his thoughts and alone in the world if he couldn’t find a way to pull it all back together.  He was trying his best to concentrate only on the Comet but as the notes reverberated they stirred everything in him he’d been unable to communicate.

            Wade was alone.  He’d done this to himself.  He wasn’t better off alone despite what he thought.  His Father’s death had made him feel abandoned and he didn’t know what to do with that.  He’d questioned everything and wondered if he’d always felt this way.  His Father was gone and so was Lorna.  Wade had even distanced himself from his Mother.  He took all of that and heaped it onto himself.  Sitting there with the Comet breaking the silence he wanted desperately to know what to feel.

            He worked his way up the scale; removing and moving bits of tape and covering all the notes he didn’t intend to play.  He listened to each solitary note and tried, as the video suggested, only experiencing each note, one at a time.  Each note, however, seemed so familiar and significant to him while the recollection and knowledge of all of his relationships entangled with the music; resonating against the walls and returning to envelope Wade in a symphony of memories he struggled to grasp and hold onto.

            He paused for moment before attending to the last note on the far right which would issue the highest note in the registry.   His hands were trembling and tears were falling against his face.  His lifetime was at his fingertips and each note was as joyous and painful as they could possibly be.

            Wade wiped the tears and closed his eyes.  He braced for the final experience.  His breath caught in his throat and struggled to blow through the remaining holes.  It would not be a long note because there was little left in Wade to give.  His body shook and everything folded in on him as he produced the final sound.

            He sat silently and listened to the echo of the final note.  Oddly it came back to him in steady intermittent tones.  There seemed to be a pattern to it and a steady reverberation every few seconds.

            Wade opened his eyes and was met with the brightness of a room that was no longer his own.  He was in some kind of medical setting and he was seated in a chair next to a hospital bed with an individual linked to life support.  The steady tones he had heard were the chirping of a life support mechanism.

            Wade stood up and looked down on the man in the bed.  It was his Father.

            “No, no, no, not here.  Why am I here?”  Wade stumbled and sat back down.

            It wasn’t possible.  He couldn’t really be there.  But it was true.  He knew this room and he somehow knew the day.  This was when it had all ended for him.  It made sense.  He’d been at his Father’s side constantly in the last days and had stepped out only briefly to speak to his Mother and Lorna.  When he’d returned, the machinery had settled into the final unending note that had signalled his Father was gone.  Now Wade was here in that moment of his own absence.  He hadn’t been there when his Father had died.  Now he was.

            Wade rose again and grabbed at his Father’s hand while his other hand held the Comet.

            “I’m here Dad.  I’m here now.”  The tears began to come again.  How unreal this all was.  Wade reached out and stroked his Father’s face and leaned in and kissed him.

            “I don’t know what’s happening Dad.  I don’t know if this is real or not.  I’m sorry I wasn’t there.  I’m here now.”  He leaned in and kissed his Father.  He reached out with both arms to hug his Father and then realized he was still holding the harmonica.

            “Look Dad, it’s a Hohner Comet.  It brought me back to you.  I’m here now.  You’re not alone.”  He added softly, “I’m here now, you can go.”  Wade held the Comet out and at that moment his Father died and the life support let out that long sound which matched the last note in the upper scale.

            There was a ‘do not resuscitate order’ so no one would rush in but Wade knew at any moment his other self would return to find his Father gone.  Wade didn’t know what to think or what to do.  He instinctively raised the Comet to his mouth to match the unending tone from the machinery.  He closed his eyes through his tears and tried to blow.  He found he couldn’t do it.  He began to sob and as he did he began to pull in air through the opposite side and the final note sounded in reverse and Wade was returned to his living room; standing alone and listening to the reverberating note fading into nothingness.

            Wade collapsed into his chair and dropped the Comet into his lap.  He wept openly and long.  It couldn’t have been real but it seemed that way.

            After his Father died, that first time, he had cursed himself for not being there at the moment of his death.  He knew his Father’s passing would have happened whether he’d been in the room or not but he’d always thought his presence might have helped his Father ease along.  The truth wasn’t about his Father but rather about Wade’s guilt.  Now the Comet had given him a second chance to experience it.  Nothing had stopped his Father from slipping away.  The outcome would always have been the same.  Wade realized that now.  The outcome would always have been the same.

            Wade thought of his Mother and Lorna after he had found his Father.  He had run from his Father’s bedside to find them.  There had been few words and many tears and Lorna had comforted him.  His Mother had gone to her husband’s side and stood holding his hand.  She had said nothing to Wade but he had felt her actions of turning from her son to be with her late husband was somehow like blame for Wade not being there in the last moments.  This was how it had all begun and ended at the same time.

            It couldn’t have happened, Wade thought to himself.  He couldn’t have been there but somehow he knew it had been real.  The Comet had taken him to a significant moment he had missed the first time around.  He was confident of that.

            Wade picked up the Comet from his lap and stared at it.  He turned it over in his hands.  It couldn’t have been possible but somehow that one note at the far end had transported him there and he’d heard the last chirps measuring the final moments of his Father’s life before the long tone signalling the end.  The pitch had been the same as that from the Comet.

            Wade got up and wandered the house; holding the Comet tightly in his hand.  All of the notes had faded out in the distance and he was alone in the quiet.  He wanted desperately to speak to Lorna and tell her of his experience.  He understood how it had been.  He’d been distant and he wasn’t there for her.  He knew now it could be different.  It was like he’d told his Father in the final moments, “I’m here now.”

            Wandering through the house and peering in all the rooms, he felt the emptiness of the home he’d made with Lorna.  He made his way to their bedroom and stared at the half made bed.  He hadn’t been able to bring himself to lying on her side and so it was just as she had left it.  His side, with the covers pulled back, was like the disorganization of his mind.  There were a jumble of emotions and thoughts and he was trying to piece them all together.

            Wade walked over to the dresser and fingered some of the things Lorna had left behind.  There was her hairbrush along with some lotions and perfumes.  He sprayed one into the room and smelled the mist that hung in the air.  This had been her favourite.  It reminded him of all the good things about Lorna he’d taken for granted this past year.

            “It’s just a break.  She’s coming back.”  Wade tried to believe that as he stared into the dresser mirror and spoke to himself.  “Lorna’s coming back.”  He sat down on the edge of the bed and stared at her things on the dresser.  She hadn’t taken everything.  She’d come back for them.  Maybe she’d come back for him.

            Wade thought about the experience with the Comet.  He felt that if he could just explain all of this to Lorna then it would be a start.  He couldn’t be certain.  He wasn’t certain of anything.  It had only been a few minutes since the Comet had brought him back, hadn’t it?  The more time that passed, the more he struggled to hold onto the memory.

            He examined the Comet again and wondered if had really happened or, if it did, could it happen again?  What if nothing happened?  Worse, what if it was the same moment all over again?  Could he handle that once more?

            Wade closed his eyes and held up the Comet.  He had to know for certain.  His hands trembled but he managed to bring the Comet to his mouth.  It was the only way.  He had to know.

            The note sounded longer than when he’d first tried it in the other room.  He felt the note resonate throughout him and he sensed he was no longer in his bedroom.  The note continued and others joined it and a woman’s voice joined in accompaniment.

            Wade opened his eyes to find himself sitting in a pew at the back of a Church.  Everyone around him was on their feet as a woman at the front sang along to an organist working their way through Elvis Presley’s “Can’t Help Falling in Love.”  Some of the notes in the song matched the one he had played sitting there alone on the side of the bed.

            He instinctively stood like the others and looked around.  He knew this moment.  His eyes quickly darted from the front to the rear and back to the front again.  This was his own wedding!  There he was at the front, grinning like an idiot and steps away were his parents…his Father alive again.

            Wade turned again and saw the bride being escorted by her own Father.  It was Lorna.  Wade’s heart broke to see her and not to be able to reach out to her.  He also wanted to dash ahead and embrace his Father and then his Mother.
This was a joyous moment and all he could do was watch from the corner and not join in.

             “Why here?” he wondered.  What was the significance and what was he to learn from this?  Had it been caught up in his longing for Lorna?  Was that the secret of the Comet?  Did it show you what you wanted to see?  Did it bring you to moments you needed to re-experience?

            Lorna was beautiful.  She always had been.  She still was.  He watched her reach the front of the church and saw her take the hand of his younger self.  Wade instinctively looked down at his own hand and saw there the Comet.  He wondered if it was time to go.  He could stay and watch the ceremony but he knew the takeaway.  That grinning idiot of a groom loved Lorna and this Wade, who should have been older and wiser, still did; even though he hadn’t shown that in a while.

            Wade put the harmonica to his mouth but before he could draw in his breath, the note sounded all on its own.  Wade looked up and saw everyone turn to stare at the organ.  The vocalist, Lorna’s cousin Barb as he now recalled, had finished singing but the last note from the organ stuck on the final refrain and continued to everyone’s surprise.

            “I remember this,” Wade said aloud.  Indeed he did remember.  He also knew what came next.

            The Minister walked over to the organ and slammed it hard on the back with his palm.

            “Sorry about that everyone, it sticks sometimes.  But on that note, shall we begin?”  The congregation broke out in laughter and so did Wade.  “Dearly Beloved,” the Minister began.

            Wade knew this was his signal.  The Minister had said “on that note.”  What was more appropriate?  Wade closed his eyes and drew back on the harmonica and was drawn back to his own bedroom in his own time.

            The room was the same.  Nothing had changed.  There were Lorna’s things on the dresser.  Wade’s eyes moved further along and stopped on the framed photo at the end.  He walked to it and picked it up. It was a wedding photo of Lorna and Wade.  There were others in the living room but this had been Lorna’s favourite.  There was the groom, Wade, staring at his bride with that ‘grinning idiot’ look that this Wade recognized from his younger self he’d seen standing at the front of the church only moments ago.

            Wade replaced the photo and looked away; drawing his focus back to the Comet.  It had happened again.  He had questioned it when he’d first been transported to his Father’s side but now he’d just returned from his own marriage ceremony.  It wasn’t just the memory of having been there both times but the realization that the same note from the far end of the harmonica had been present on both occasions.  It had signalled the end of his Father’s life in one instance and the beginning of his married life with Lorna in the other.  How strange it was that he now recalled that note clearer than before.  How could he have forgotten the key sticking on the organ?  The unending sound from the life support machine hadn’t been forgotten; he’d tried hard to deliberately block it out.  It had been too painful.

            Wade held up the Comet and wondered if that had been all there was to it.  Were there just the two defining moments?  Something told him there had to be something more.  The more he thought of that final note, the more it pressed him to remember something else.  Did the Comet hold another secret?  There was only one way to find out.  Wade closed his eyes, while pursing his lips, and blew long and hard into the far right opening.

            The experience was the same as it had been before.  He sensed it.  He opened his eyes to find himself no longer where he had stood before.  Gone was his bedroom and that photo of the ‘grinning idiot’.  This new room was a pale blue and decorated with cartoon animal caricatures.  It was a nursery of some sort.  Wade turned and viewed what he knew instinctively would be there.  It was a baby’s crib and inside was a young infant beginning to stir.

            Wade did not recognize this room or this moment.  He had no memory of this.  The only thing familiar were the notes of a musical mobile suspended above the crib.  One of those notes was the same note that brought him here.  He could hear it winding down and soon it was quiet.  But it wasn’t quiet for long.  The baby began to stir more vigorously and to cry out.

            Wade was confused.  Who was this child?  Where were they?  When were they?  He didn’t have time to think long on his own questions because he heard someone coming down a hall.  He looked around and spied a closet.  Wade quickly hid himself within; leaving the door open a crack so he could watch the scene unfold.  He’d had a brief thought when this might be but with no memory of his own, he couldn’t be sure.

            He watched as a young woman entered the room and went to the child’s side.  Wade had only quickly caught a glimpse of her before she had turned her back to him.

            “Hush now, what’s the fuss?”  She leaned in and picked up the babe and cradled it in her arms.

            “Is everything okay?”  Wade glanced over at a young man who had entered the room.  At first Wade thought it was another past version of himself but then he realized it was his Father.  That meant the woman was his Mother!

            The woman walked out into the room with the infant and began to rock him back and forth.  Wade could see her clearly now.  It was his Mother and she was holding him.  No wonder he had no memory of this.  He’d been too young to recall it but that note had played and the chord had remained with him.

            “It’s all right,” his Mother said to his Father.  “The mobile had just run down.  Can you wind it again?”  Wade’s Father obliged.

            “That’s all?  Are you sure he’s not hungry or maybe something else?  Maybe he, well, you know.”  Wade’s Father couldn’t bring himself to say what he was thinking.  Silently from his hiding spot, Wade chuckled to himself.  He’d been the same way when his own children had been born.  He didn’t like to talk about it but he’d pitched in and done his share of diaper changing.  Wade wondered how his Father had fared in that department.

            “He’s all right, I tell you,” his Mother continued.  “You’re going to be all right Wade.  Mother’s here now.  I’m here now.”  The infant Wade was quiet and his Mother placed him back in the crib and both parents silently stole from the room as the mobile played on with its familiar notes.

            Wade quietly crept from the closet and looked down at his younger self.  This one wasn’t a ‘grinning idiot’ yet but Wade knew it would come.  Wade knew what was in store for this child.

            “You’ll be okay kid.  I think we both will be.”  Wade smiled and then closed his eyes; raising the Comet and drawing back against the far right holes.

            The return experience was the same.  He felt the shift and on opening his eyes he knew he’d be back in his own bedroom.  He was.

            Wade didn’t dwell on his return or this last experience.  He had to try it again.  He had to know what else there was to learn.  Nothing happened, however, on subsequent tries.  There was no folding and no re-experienced memories.  Only the note sounded and then was gone.  He removed and moved the bits of tape and tried every hole.  Only the notes sounded.

            Wade placed the Comet on the dresser in front of his wedding photo.

            “We’ve had quite the time kid,” he said to his photo, “or times, depending on how you look at.”  He looked away from the photo and towards the Comet and then back to the photo again.

            It had all been real and that one note had been signalling to him each time.  For all Wade knew, it had been signalling to him all of his life.  All of that, he thought, from a single note.  He’d have to learn them all now.  He’d have to learn to properly play the Comet.

            “Take care of it for me,” he said to the photo of the ‘grinning idiot’.  “I’ll get back to it.  There are some other things that need my attention first.”

            Wade knew he’d get back to the harmonica and he would master it but he needed to define his focus somewhere else first.  He needed to fix things with his Mother and with Lorna.  He understood that now.  They had never abandoned him.  He’d done that to himself.

            “I don’t know what this has all been about but I think I get the gist,” he said to the Comet.  “You’ll be okay, Wade” he said to his photo.  “You’ll be okay,” he repeated to his reflection.  He stroked the Comet and turned to leave the bedroom.  As if in answer, the final note sounded.

            Wade bent down and put and ear to the harmonica.  It was silent but throughout the house the final note was sounding.  It took him a moment before he realized it was his door chime.

            Wade hustled through the house and to the front door.  The chime had stopped and he could hear the sound of a key fitted in the lock.  The door opened to reveal…

            “Lorna, you’re here?”  Wade looked at this wife and grinned that idiot smile.

            Lorna looked back at Wade and wondered about the smile.  She hadn’t seen her husband’s smile in a long time.

            “Oh, Wade, I didn’t know you were home.  I tried the bell first but there was no answer.”

            “I’m here now,” Wade responded.

            Lorna looked at Wade and recalled his words.  It was something in the way he’d said ‘I’m here now’ that indicated he really was.

            “I’m here now,” Wade repeated.  It was a start.

THE END